Day 114 Supplementary Reading and the Great God of Small Gifts

56p in my purse, 1 American Cent and 5 Euro Cents I`ve found. But I am richer than the rich, learning about the gift of living by faith. I so desperately needed to buy tissue, which is £1 in Iceland. I prayed, Lord you know I`ve got a cold and haven’t got a pound to by tissue, please I need that pound. And a couple of hours later I looked down on the ground by the entrance of the little park and there it was a £1. I am so happy with my Kleenex. I also got some posh lip gloss, face cream and bath salt from Diana`s goody bag, which made my day!

Monsieur Thesis was very gentle to me today. We only spent a few hours together before and after work, but it was really fruitful. It also helped a great deal I suppose that I stopped drinking coffee and rather opt to decaf tea whenever I can. I read through 26 pages and tomorrow finally I am going to start refining the discussion part. That is the longest. I managed to write a couple of chapters on stuff that I originally cut out, but at the end I had to put it back to make sense.

Supplementary Reading

Following up the research findings, some of the areas looked at became less evident due to the historical and cultural shifts. The three main outcomes of the Sanderson interview: the church as an existing organisation to help social enterprises, the role of microfinance in entrepreneurial activity within a chosen group to create sustainable livelihoods and raising funds for micro finance were looked at.

The role of the church in entrepreneurship in Hungary:

Religion had played a significant role in the history of Hungary up until the communist takeover in 1948. The fact that communism was against religion especially in the 1950s and 1960s (Tomka, 2004) to lessen its direct influence on education and on the whole nation (Kenez, 2006) resulted in a considerate shift in its role in the community’s well-being by the decreasing number of the congregations. Therefore opposite to Five Talents’ example in Africa, the church in Hungary is not in a situation to play a significant role in the communities’ social entrepreneurial activities. To be able to use its network for job creation it needs to increase its role in the community by increasing the number of the congregations which is a lengthy process due to the distrust the communist regime created between the citizens and the church. This was to decrease and disable the power of the second biggest organizational body, the church next to the government where people have the same voice and could potentially question the ideology of communism.

Microfinance in Hungary:

Microfinance activity in Hungary is relatively low. The first programs started with Nest in helping projects which were funded for the disabled using craft as a mean to express and produce. The EU’s micro finance programs targets SME`s which already have to show economic activity and a lengths of registration at least one year.

Ideas based on similar principle to micro finance, helping the local community can be found in Hungary. The conservative government initiated the `Shop of the Poor’, where locally produced food is sold for a lower price by cutting out the middle-man. This helps both the producer and the customer to sell and buy locally and to keep the money within the community.

The role of the civil sector in supporting job creation Social Enterprise:

In a society where everyone feels vulnerable craft projects employing the disabled get exemption from paying the high monthly fees after employees, which makes artisans even more vulnerable as their products are higher priced due to these fees they have to pay (Kocsor to Fodor, 2009). This vicious circle of tax creates a discomfort between enterprises and social enterprises.

Fundraising for Social Enterprise:

The level of distrust in Hungary towards fundraising and charitable financial activity is high. The number of companies who would donate to help the unemployed back to work is low. The main factors holding back fundraising activities in Hungary are the lack of guarantee in trustworthiness and credibility of those who request support and the lack of regulations for the ethical forms of fundraising. The Corporate Strategy of Philanthropy (Corporate Donations in Hungary) Research project on Nonprofit Organisations, Budapest, 2005 (Eszter Harsanyi, Eva Kuti, Mihaly Laki, Eva Revesz, Marianna Torok). During communism fundraising and charitable activity became centralised and when it revived after the fall of communism in high number of cases it was used for money laundering, which increased the level of distrust between potential donors and those who request support.

Day 113 Mini melt-down over half an hour sleep during the final push

Yesterday evening I fall asleep whilst writing the thesis. When my roommate came home I woke up and had a mini melt down over the half an hour I spent with sleeping. I was angry and disappointed with myself that I really need to keep to my schedules now and instead what do I keep doing? Fall asleep. The mini meltdown consisted of some rather peculiar inability to tolerate typing noises around me and an overall inside cry for a place in the flat where I could be on my own and concentrate. I moved to the living room and just by the time I got into the nitty-gritty what Yvonne told me on Study Support, Stephen popped his head through the door asking me about our next Love Shack meal and proceeded on to the sofa to work on his laptop. I started to panic thinking where can I go. Izzy was in our bedroom, the kitchen was taken and now the living room was shared as well. I did play with the thought of sitting on the downstairs loo, but my laptop was charging and there is no socket around there. At the end I asked Di and Jonathan in the kitchen to let me know when they finish with dinner. They finished already and gave me some really lovely encouragement and prayed. That was around 22.30 and after that I was up until 1am working through the bits Yvonne helped me with. She got my old course leader’s e-mail and translated it to simple English. She told me I need to try to like that woman again, she actually tried to help me, but it was a shame she wrote all her comments in underlined red, which really freaked me out. So now I am adding and correcting the first half of the thesis and a bit concerned at the same time, that I still have a lot to do on the second half and I only have 6 days left.

Something amazing happened. Diana offered that I could use her printer, if mine won’t work. I bought ink for mine a while ago and was thinking I just can’t get other one, but same day in the evening someone rang me to say would like to bless me with a very small amount of money. Praise God I am going to have a little money towards the ink!

Day 112 Introductions and Conclusions

A friend of mine just told me the introduction and conclusion of each chapter is the most important parts of the thesis. This is what people normally read

I had a very encouraging meeting with my new course leader and finally I cracked Literature Review. I have a bit more than 24.000 words and I am falling asleep. Night Night Monsieur Thesis. See you again at 7 in the morning!

Literature Review

Introduction

The effects of policy making on the decreasing number of Hungarian artisans has not been researched to the extent to find theories about it, therefore the following related areas were looked at:

1. Change of conception: the Greater Awareness

2. `Bubble up and trickle down’

3. From centralised craftsmanship to necessity entrepreneurs

4. Opportunity Entrepreneurs versus Necessity Self-employed

5. The Evolution of the Hungarian tax system in the 1980’s

6. Innovation Capacity and Small to Medium Enterprise development in Hungary and EU

Conclusion:

Trickle down business and economic activity could potentially decrease the number of self-employed and have a positive effect on artisans by creating a consumer base with disposable income. However due to the nature of uncertainty how long it takes for a potential innovative company to grow into a big corporation in Hungary to exercise the trickle-down effect for the greater well-being of the nation mentioned above, the writer concludes by changing policies and decreasing the high entrepreneurial fees for start-up microenterprises the foundation of their opportunity to become economic players and entering the local market would lay the foundation for the full advantage the trickle down consumer base could take on their products and services.

Day 111 The Discovery of Pumpkin Pies and Traditional Craft and the Role of Heritage

Chirpy Sunday! This week I became an official fan of Thanksgiving dinners! I never had pumpkin pie, green bean casserole or sweet potato pie with marshmallows before, but now I know what cracks the turkey. I had the best stuffing ever thanks to Jess, and the nicest 10kg turkey thanks to Christina. All the 15 of us looked heavily pregnant by the end of the meal and couldn’t sit straight. We laughed and laughed, sharing jokes and stories. It was a great evening. Christina brought over the leftover ‘soda’ (so American) today. I`ve been craving them for so long and now we have 4 different bottles. I find it pretty amazing how things turn up when I crave them. I remember Friday lunchtime thinking I can`t wait to be able to do my first food shopping and make a nice chicken dish. That very evening I was given a massive pot of chicken casserole. God`s provision is just mind blowing. Rachel told me about her experience when she did Mission Year, how she was provided from unexpected sources. I did believe her, but I found it extremely difficult to capture the reality of it. And now I am experiencing the very essence of it.

I spent many hours with Monsieur Thesis today. We got on a lot better than yesterday. Most likely I can thank that to the cups of coffees I didn’t have. It really helped I felt lot calmer and happier about the writing process than yesterday and finally finished the Literature Review and the Discussion. I still have bits to write, do the editing, printing and binding, but I feel relieved by finishing off the monster of all the theories. I`ve got 24.580 words at the moment and am going to meet my new course leader tomorrow and see what she says about this.

I`ve read the thesis through so many times, I can’t differentiate any more, what I wrote already and what I only had the intention to do so. It all feels like a big flowing pool of words. At the end of the day I rewarded myself with watching the The 5^th Element. Great movie. It was good to switch Monsieur Thesis off for a bit. I also took regular breaks to rest my eyes, so I didn’t end up with a pirate eye by the end of the day like yesterday.

`Discussion

In this section the writer discusses in depths the result of findings and theories starting with the role of fashion in consumers’ life. The added value of design in economics and sustainable development. Looks into traditional craft and the role of heritage in Hungary`s transition economy. The customs of consumption and difficulties of advocating local production through analysing and explaining about fashion related entrepreneurial activity and its costs in form of monthly fees and taxes by using the case studies. And finally looks at the ‘New Souvenir’ concept based on local skills – felt making, materials – sheep wool and markets – spa tourist industry.

Fashion and the added value of design

The fashion industry takes a multilevel approach to provide a platform to its consumers to create, explore and experiment through identity, belonging and community when making choices in buying and wearing clothes. At the same time Design is an `added value` a vital factor in the economic success of businesses and nations. (John A Walker: Design History and the History of Design).

Sustainable development addresses three interrelated areas: environment, social and economic sustainability. The relationship between these subjects provides a challenging platform for the successful integration of design principles. Harris expresses that `We must learn to use less and to use what is available, rather than always creating specific, new components and materials that require more energy and resources, and thus have a greater detrimental impact because contemporary aesthetic norms are based in capital – intensive, highly automated, unsustainable procedures. (page 76, Marvin Harris, the Rise of Anthropological Theory, 1968).

Traditional Craft and the role of heritage

Traditional craft is part of an ethnical group’s cultural heritage. It used to define a sense of belonging to a family, village, county or nation. Through the intricate visual language of craft, history and emotions were expressed and kept alive. It was a tool to communicate and for many a means to earn a living. Whilst historical and political changes have played a major role in shaping the heritage of traditional craft, globalisation is playing an even more serious part in the decline of artisanship. This impact together with the current policy making has a negative effect on the decreasing number of Hungarian artisans, even though there could be countless opportunities in the fashion industry to team up with artisans to create value and explore areas where aesthetics and design innovation could result in products that are more sustainable and designed with a considerate design approach in all the three fundamental areas: materials, skills and markets.

Throughout the research in traditional craft in Hungary, where there are more than fifteen different ethnic groups living, it was realised that the European Union as a whole has a rich and varied number of traditional craft techniques and variation of skills, which are not explored to the extent that could benefit the already existing problems generated by climate change . Glocal Trinnovation’s design approach aims to reduce the negative impact of product design and development processes on the environment by using local skills and materials for the local market, which potentially have low carbon footprint during the production and retail process.

Artisanship in Hungary is considered cheap labour. This belief generated from the experience during communism, where the living wage was relatively low and the product availability less. As well as the consumers, artisans earned low wages too. That made it possible for the products to be priced lower than those available in shops. Also products made by artisan were one off, which created an added value in an era where the choice was centralised and limited at the same time.

Whilst in England hand-made products have a revival and a new consumer base is emerging desiring to buy ethically designed and made products to support the local community to create a better feel when wearing garments or using the products. In Hungary even though the structure of earning is not centrally equal any more, still the third of the population lives on minimum wage. After the fall of communism since the free market opened up and brought more choices and cheaper goods and services than the artisans could compete with, their income decreased, but their monthly payable fees increased. Due to the price increase artisan products became luxury goods during Hungary`s transition economy for the those who were the consumer base before the fall of communism. The aim of Glocal Trinnovation is changing customs of consumption and advocating local production to help creating an innovative service to balance out the widening gap between the needs of consumers, the needs of artisan and the needs of the government.’

Day 110 Second to Last Saturday in Higher Education

7.23am

I can’t believe I am actually going to be free in 11 days and I only have to spend 1 more Saturday with Monsieur Thesis and after I officially become a free woman. As soon as I sign the form when my work is handed in at the Registry Office at uni, I won’t have any more early mornings, late nights and weekends spent with studying. I am so excited about this whole new chapter of my life! I can’t even imagine how it is going to feel, but I am just so grateful for every minute of this new adventure. 10 years ago when I started a Level 2 Interior Design course in Surrey I had no idea that by this time I would end up with a BA and very nearly finishing an MA. That is just one hack of a miracle as I had to work full-time all the way to finance my studies. Well I think in that respect it is fair enough to encounter a breakdown on the way under such pressure of literally having 2 full-time jobs for so long: being a full-time student and working full-time.

But until the breath of freedom reaches my nostrils on the 7^th December I have to keep going with Monsieur Thesis, as we still have a lot of ties to cut in our relationship. We have been wrestling over the Literature Review for a few days now and finally after ending up with a 5000 word document, what is almost an essay on its own, I started ruthlessly cutting out massive chunks and aiming to reduce it for a 1000. Yesterday during Kerst`s Winter Queen evening in the church, I set on the mezzanine during the first half of his performance and I had a real breakthrough with the Literature Review. Suddenly all those different bits and pieces I read and collected in the past three years started to make sense. This was the third time I took Monsieur Thesis to church and on every occasion I had such an inspiration to write and understand bits I struggled with before. I believe places can inspire our mind and soul in such settled ways that it almost feels like a miracle.

8.03am

Back to Monsieur Thesis.

9.05

Seriously I can’t wait to finish this Literature Review! Since that tutorial on Thursday when I was told I might not pass, I am just over conscious with every word I write. Come on, pull yourself together and wiz on that keyboard!!!

10.40am

Complete, utter meltdown over Literature Review in front of Christina and Izzy! I am experiencing the difficulty of my chosen research area.

16.07pm

Couple of hours after the melt down I left the Literature review and moved onto the Findings From Case Studies, which I wrote very quickly thank God.

16.17pm

My right eye is really sore I need to take a break. 5 min under cucumber slices.

16.23pm

I could feel my right eye throbbing, not an encouraging sign. Now am having pirate eye. Hope no one knocks on the door and catches me with this black and green scarf clip on my hair to protect my eye.

From Monsieur Thesis:

`A central tenet of industrial capitalism is growth, but nothing can grow for ever, and we now seem to be reaching the limits of growth – at least in terms of the types of growth we have valued over the past century.’ (Page 73 13 - Confronting Global Collapse, Envisioning a Sustainable Future, McClelland and Stewart Inc.)

`Bubble up and trickle down’

This theory originates from the relationship between polarised definitions of opposite forces depending on which way they relate to each other. In the fashion industry it manifests itself in the relationship between Haute Couture and street style. Whilst Haute Couture has been trickling down to inspire the high street fashion during the first half of the 20^th century in the 1960’s the Bubble up effect of youth wearing Jeans and Miniskirt started to influence and inspire Haute Couture.

Szerb`s theory for Hungary`s economic growth is based on the trickle-down effect, where the government and its policy making could potentially support those innovative SME’s which have the capability to grow into a company like NOKIA in Finland, which largely contributes to the country’s GDP. That way in Hungary a relatively stable and wider upper income class would be generated, which could benefit the lower income class on the long-term by spending more money on employing and investing in it. Szerb also argues that even though these ‘gazelle’ businesses are up to EU standards in terms of their innovative advantages, once they get to the point of needing investment to grow from SMEs to larger companies they could lose their competitive advantage in the Innovation market due to lack of funding and high taxation under the current policy making.`

Day 109 Winter Queen Debut

5.30am

I decided not to think about the tutorial yesterday and I just pretend for a few days it didn’t n even happen. I can always get back to the notes in about a week time once the thesis in a good shape and go from there what I physically have time left to change. I really need to concentrate on the positives now.

Quote for the day: `Some people are so focused on goals and achievements they don’t even realise if you drop that next to them.’

I was so tired all day, I couldn`t even have a proper conversation. Kerst`s debut went really well. All the free of us, who took part in making the video got interviewed and I had the dress on a mannequin while I talked about it. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxGfhR8bFHM).

Small contribution towards Literature review:

`A central tenet of industrial capitalism is growth, but nothing can grow for ever, and we now seem to be reaching the limits of growth – at least in terms of the types of growth we have valued over the past century.’ Page 73 13 - Confronting Global Collapse, Envisioning a Sustainable Future, McClelland and Stewart Inc What is the new type of growth the 21st century has for the balance between humans and their habitat the earth? What is the new type of growth century has for fashion? Is it still based on economic growth or well-being?

However, in general terms, sustainable development addresses there interrelated areas: environmental stewardship, social equity and justice, and economic issues. (page16)

Within the current system the dominant measure of success is financial profit, with little else of comparable importance, than change is slow and it is difficult to stray too far from convention. Marvin Harris, the Rise of Anthropological Theory (1968) However, ‘The creative economy has the potential to generate income and jobs while promoting social inclusion, cultural diversity and human development’ (UNCTAD).

Day 108 A 48-hour Roller Coaster Ride and the Power of Encouragement/Discouragement

Two days ago, when I left the Study Support Office at uni I was confident I could finish the thesis on time and been working hard up until this morning. I went to bed late, got up early in the, had my phone at hand to make notes on the go. There was a buzz in the air and my overall belief in the project and in myself was restored to the extent, as it was when I started in 2008. Yvonne spent an hour encouraging me about the amount of research I`ve done, the outcomes and the project itself, which she can see could potentially make positive impact on people`s life. She went through with me on all the things that could make me think I wouldn`t pass. It was a great morning and I was once again happy about the choice of research area I so strongly believe in against all the difficulties I`ve encountered since the start.

This morning I had a tutorial over the phone with my old course leader, who told me, it didn’t matter how much research I`ve done if I don’t fill the criteria for the learning outcomes I won’t get a pass. I really did not need to hear that 2 weeks before hand-in. It was a hit below the waist from someone who forgot to refer me to the disability board when I got ill. She asked me some very complicated questions that I couldn’t answer, leaving me questioning my own ability for research and writing. This is crazy, who an earth would say to a student two weeks before handing in a master`s thesis, that they might not pass? Even if she thinks that, she had 3 years to tell me!!! I am not happy! I thought we would just meet for 10 min to talk through the bits was missed out a year ago from the process. And I got a tutorial instead which is really stressing me out now. This is the second time this happened. More than a year ago, when I wanted to tell her that something wasn’t right, she just brushed it off and gave me a tutorial about my project asking me all those complicated questions I couldn’t answer.

I just talked to my mum, she said, whatever if you don’t pass you don’t pass, you`ve done what could, so don’t worry. I LOVE MY MUM!!!

Day 107 14 Days to Go and it is Hand-in, Aims and Objectives Full On

Aims and Objectives

The aim of this thesis is to investigate the reasons for the decline in numbers of practising skilled artisans in Hungary since the fall of communism.

The objectives are to compare the situation in Hungary with that of the UK and Italy, to consider the status of artisans from both that of the worker and consumer point of view, to investigate the role of policy making both in the EU and Hungary in this decline and to survey the current economic climate in Hungary.

Rational

Among the emerging theories and practices of fashion related local development approaches within the sustainability framework around the world the emphasis of this study is on artisan microenterprises within the European Union, which potentially could contribute to the long-term economic growth. In relation to the geographical, economic and political heritage the chosen country is Hungary. It is located in the centre of Europe, joined the European Union in 2004 and going through transition economy during a recession after forty years of communism.

The research problem is to justify the importance of lowering the entrepreneurial taxes in Hungary to preserve and transform traditional craft through innovation. This is in line with the European Union`s proposal of increasing the level of innovation in SME`s within the EU. The unexplored research field`s validity is justified by the hypothesis of promoting and researching law carbon footprint considerate design processes by looking at local skills, materials and markets within the field of fashion by encouraging students to design innovative products to help Hungarian artisans to create sustainable livelihoods, but not being aware of the relationship between business, economics and policy making on a bigger scale to understand why the artisans in question are not able to enter and stay on the market.

Glocal Trinnovation intends to bring awareness and draw attention through this study to expand knowledge about the reasons behind the effects of policy making on the decreasing number of Hungary artisans and on a wider scale lays the foundation of further research within the European Union. It aims to support local production and job creation from a bottom up approach by affecting the government`s policy making.

Day 106 Methodology: Why How and What

Interviews

The interviews have been chosen after careful consideration following the path of the master’s journey. Most of the interviewees and case studies requested full anonymity and no pictures taken of their work. This is due to the culture of lack of trust in people, the society and the government. This is part of the post-communist heritage and embedded in the experience of never knowing who is a member of the secret police and who might uses their power to bring someone down. It is important for the reader in question to try and understand the necessity to detach from the practices, heritage and culture of their own country to be able to fully embrace the cultural differences of this study. Many parts of this research is based on the writers full understanding of the culture even though it also created barriers with people to the extent of finding it almost impossible to understand why a western university would approve a research based in Hungary. Also it was a challenge for people approached for interviews to understand that whilst the Hungarian masters system gives set research themes for their students London College of Fashion encourages students to explore new research areas. The low number of practical implementation of innovative research at the Hungarian higher education is further discussed under the Innovation Management.

Stage I.

Looking for transferable experience from Africa to set up social enterprise in Hungary.

· Tom Sanderson, the UK Director of Five Talents trying to unfold the steps of realisation in the organisation`s success in Africa. At this stage the research was mainly focused on looking for a new exciting model for social enterprise in Hungary to be able to provide sustainable solution for women to generate income through fashion related artisan projects for local customers.

· Dr Laszlo Szerb, associate professor at University of Pécs Faculty of Business and Economics, whose expertise in SME and entrepreneurship in Hungary has given a fundamental insight to the writer between the importance of Business and Innovation, Opportunity entrepreneurship and necessity self-employed.

Stage II.

Identifying local skills, materials and markets in Hungarian local development.

· During the process of looking for local skills, materials and markets the research started off by investigating what local skills are available and potential consumers the writer conducted a series of interview with three artisans working in the field of fashion by using the criteria of village and town tailoring, being in full-time employment and necessity self-employment.

· During analysing these interviews the focus shifted onto the criteria of necessity self-employed and a basket weaver, a ceramist and a jewellery maker was interviewed. The basket weaver runs a successful business, the ceramist and the jewellery maker are not in a position to start an enterprise.

· The outcome of these interviews raised the question when how and why necessity self-employment was created and to be able to follow the journey of this phenomenon two interviews were conducted based on the criteria of looking at a there generational village tailoring family and a carpenter with 50 years of experience.

· Additionally an interview was conducted with Andrea Barcsai the head of Ibsen Craft College at Bekescsaba to gain knowledge about the future of potential artisans.

Case Studies

Stage I.

What holds back microenterprises in Hungary?

Three of the interviews had been revisited, studied and analysed more in depth to understand what were the main obstacles in starting up as self-employed to practice craft based skills. The main criteria for these case studies were that during the initial interviews all of them said the reason they could not start a microenterprise because they cannot afford to start up and pay the monthly high entrepreneurial monthly fees to the government.

Stage II.

What is the historical evidence of this hold back?

A detailed case study follows through the writer`s three generational village tailor family history. This case study has been chosen in reflection of the writer’s aspiration to start a fashion microenterprise in 2004 in Hungary. Due to the high entrepreneurial monthly fees and the bureaucracy burden this aspiration was put on hold until 2010 and became a reality in England. By examining family documents, tax papers and an in-depth interview with the second generation made it possible to the writer to get a full understanding of several local and historical changes of demand, the shift of availability in products and the change of taxation due to going into a the transition economy from a centralised government.

Low carbon Footprint Considerate Design

Inspired by the experience gained in Southern Africa in 2007 and 2008 to design and make products by using local skills, materials and markets gave the writer a unique insight about the advantages of localism and its positive effects on the community. This interest was recaptured during a Considerate Design workshop at London College of Fashion looking at the possibilities of low Carbon Footprint during the design, making and retail process.

Traditional felt making and natural dying

During summer 2009 the writer spent a week learning traditional Hungarian felt making and natural dying at the Folk Art Association of Bekes County’s Artisan Camp at Bekescsaba. The reason for choosing felt making was that out of the craft skills thought there that was the one where sheep wool was available locally in the village.

Soap making

Learning the process of felt making and traditional Hungarian felt pattern design from the time of the settlement of Magyars into Hungary raised questions in the writer about traditional wool cleaning processes, which does not use pesticides. During researching into what environmentally friendly substance was available in the village to possibly clean wool with the writer came across the traditional home made soap. Based on an old recipe as part of the practical journey, the soap-making process was undertaken.

Wool washing

The process of wool cleaning is one requiring considerate amount of water and strong cleaning detergents. By researching different methods of wool washing the writer decided to follow the cold water soak hand wash using home-made soap.

Felt-making

The experiment with felt making started on a basic idea and took the first steps to realisations. As the theoretic research progressed the product design and development part of the realisation was held back and the main emphasis was put on the effects of policy making on the decreasing number of Hungarian artisans instead. The practicality of this thesis is based on the theory that could potentially bring a positive change, rather than creating products from Hungarian materials in Hungary for customers in Hungary and not having the opportunity to start a micro enterprise around it due to the high entrepreneurial taxes and the bureaucracy burden. This consideration takes on a long-term approach.

Supplementary Reading

During the theoretical research process several areas has been looked at to gain full understanding of the complexity the subject requires. At an early stage after conducting the Sanderson report, several areas were looked at:

· The role of the church in entrepreneurship

· The role of the civil sector in supporting job creation

· Fundraising for social enterprise

· Microfinance in Hungary

· The level of distrust and the lack of team work due to the 40 years communism.

Day 105 The Matter of Modern Day Persuasion

My observation is that as human beings we don’t listen to each other. We tell people we have no time to do something even what`s more giving very good reasons to underpin our request not to be disturbed until the date of a deadline we have to meet and the full details how behind we are in realistically meeting this deadline and they still try to persuade us to do things for them! This is exactly the same when you tell someone you don’t drink and the person in question tries to force a glass of wine in your hands saying `juts this time, please`. Come on lovely people please do try to use your ears for what it was meant to be created for to listen and your understanding for the purpose it supposed to serve recognising the meaning of a sentence that was spoken out of the mouth of the person who is very behind on her thesis and she has a deadline to meet on the 7^th December.

I am ruthlessly cutting away stuff from the thesis, that is not needed, still have 120 pages and more than 45.000 words, which needs to be scaled down to 15.000 good ones. I managed to cut out more than 10 pages from the following 2 sections of practical research (I still need to do the referencing in Harvard style, but that can wait until the final editing stage:

London Business School

`By taking part in the New Creative Ventures Masters Elective at London Business School, studying with MBA students the writer came to realise through case studies and a practical business plan writing process for an innovative product, that the driving force of innovation is profit and growth. Therefore the writer’s desire to come up with a new exciting business model for a social enterprise to help Hungarian artisans to start up was abolished in a considerable short amount of time by simply realising that economists want growth and businessmen profit.

Innovation Management

To be able to familiarise the current state of Innovation Management in Hungary the writer took part in Innostart`s Innovation Manager e-learning course. In contrast with London Business School where the lectures based on case studies and discussions the Innovation Management course was heavily text based with very few case studies to relate to, therefore the knowledge gained was less useful than desired.

Innovation, business and economics are symbiotic driving factors of the world economy. Tomorrow’s growth is based on the foundations of policy making around this symbiosis today. Hungary on one hand is praised for for its achievements in innovation and support of innovative businesses during the 17. Europen Business Network Conference on the other hand (Janos Pakucs, Kulcsár László). Gale, Cengage `OECD Economic Survey on Hungary pointed out in 2005 the level of innovation activity and performance has remained relatively low by international standards. This is attributable to both lagging innovation capabilities in the business sector and an insufficient contribution of public research organisations to the innovation system. There is a need for more stable governance of the innovation system and a more evidence-based approach to policy making in the area of science, technology and innovation policy. ‘Healthy general business conditions are the precondition for Hungarian innovation to take off. This should be a key consideration in overall thinking on innovation policy.’ (OECD, 2005d, p. 15) www.nih.gov.hu.

`The conception of innovation has evolved significantly over the last forty years. During the 1950s, innovation was considered a discrete development resulting from studies carried out by isolated researchers. Nowadays, innovation is no longer conceived as a specific result of individual actions, but more as a problem-solving process. Innovation as defined by the European Commission is «the renewal and enlargement of the range of products and services and the associated markets; the establishment of new methods of production, supply and distribution; the introduction of changes in management, work organisation, and the working conditions and skills of the workforce».` Kline, S.J. and Rosenberg, N. (1986).European Commission’s 1995 Green Paper on Innovation COM.

As the world moved away from knowledge-based economy, to knowledge- driven economy within the EU knowledge-driven activity is not restricted to a few glamorous industries, but applies to all European industry sectors 5 World Bank (1998). The nature of concentrating funds on a few industries can at the same time bring more significant results: biochemistry and Nano technology. The nature of EU’s economy the high(?) numbers of SME’s could play a significant part in innovative, competitive advantages. Therefore EU is giving high priority to Innovation to increase its competiveness in the world market. Even though the number of excellent scientists and the quality of publications are high, these facts don’t have the desired effect on the EU`s economic growths. The ‘knowledge’ within the EU is up to the world`s standard, but its application is slow and the number of patents are low compared to those in America and Japan. This is stressed by the strengthening Chinese and Indian competition. For that reason the EU set out in the Lisbon Program 2001 – 2010 to improve the competitive advantages of innovation. But the half – term Kok report hasn’t realised much improvement and concluded that the import of cheap Chinese and Indian products are increasing the EU’s disadvantages. This increase of disadvantage has brought significant changes within the EU not only in the field of Innovation, but hand-craft as well.`

I really need to write the Economic, Politics and Policy Making sub heading today!

Day 104 The Mystery Man Monsieur M. A. Thesis

Going back to the rabbit from yesterday I`ve found another note in the pool of information of Monsieur M. A. Thesis. (I texted a friend the other day saying I couldn’t make a meeting because I was having a date with Monsieur Thesis. Since then out three year old relationship is official. And I can’t wait to break up with him on the 7^th when I hand him in at the university registry office!!!)

`Give a man a fish` rabbit/goat/duck projects in Hungary. Could the government give a 6 months entrepreneurial tax free start-up to an artisan the same way as it gives rabbits to help local development and poverty? The tax free 6 months cannot be sold or eaten before it starts to bread.

After all my Roman-rabbit-invasion was only one of the rabbit-theories I have, the other refers to a government founded project in Hungary where families with kids living in poverty got either rabbits ducks or goats to keep them as well for breading as for their meat to be able to feed their children. Last time a project like this started in our village back home most of the participant franticly tried to sell the rabbits and rabbit food for cash well under the market price before they started to bread. I had this thought that if the government can finance projects like that, could they not give tax breaks for starting up artisans for about 6 months or so? Well, it would cost more than a few rabbits in terms of losing out on the monthly fees, but they haven’t got those fees anyway until someone starts up. I absolutely love the English self-employed system, which lets people establish themselves and potentially grow to be able to even employ people. In Hungary there is still this false theory if you are self-employed you must be very well off. That is in most cases very far from the truth. Those who do decide to become entrepreneurs against all the odds are more likely necessity entrepreneurs and simply try to create jobs for themselves in the hope of success to make ends meet and create a better livelihood than being on benefits.

I hope nobody has a binocular on the other side of the market peeping through our window what we do. I am sitting in the living room with Monsieur Thesis wrestling about a rather tense part of our relationship just a couple weeks before breaking up. I can’t express how sore my eyes are. I just put on one of those freezing beauty masks to calm them down. But I think it is only psychological, because I only left it for a few seconds under cold running water. At least it gives me some destruction of concentrating on my eyes. It is a rather uncomfortable soreness. Someone I know has glaucoma and after reading up on it, I keep thinking, I hope I am not pressuring my eye too much in these last couple of weeks that I end up partially or totally losing my sight. Good old hypochondria!

One of my flat mates just told me I look like a super hero with this mask and that gave me a bit of comfort to think superheroes most likely don’t get glaucoma. But anyone peeping through from the opposite flats would just think looking at me with this turquoise blue plastic mask on my eyes that they are living opposite to a bunch of nutcases, well… at least one of us not to generalize the others.

Ok, the glasses I found on the grass a couple of weeks ago helped a bit to start with. The beauty mask gave me the superhero confidence and a couple of slices cucumbers made wonders. Finally I can get back to wrestling with Monsieur Thesis.

Day 103 STARFISH & RABBIT!!!

I’ve just found the most random research note as I am reading through the thesis:

‘We talk and do so much about fair-trade and ethical wage in developing countries, but seem to forget about our local makers and artisans. Local development is just as important to preserve our cultural heritage and create sustainable livelihoods. STARFISH & RABBIT!!!`

STARFISH & RABBIT??? I think the starfish stands for the little boy throwing starfish back to the sea one by one after tide and when a man told him he should have stopped because he couldn’t have make a difference for all of them, the boy picked on up, thrown it back to the sea and said he made a difference to that one. The revival of local artisan products are like that, every time policy making gets closer to promoting and supporting local production it makes a different for the legacy of artisans. I also think I had this theory of cheap Asian products taking over the EU like the rabbits England introduced by the Romans. As the rabbits invaded the habitat of many native animals causing almost extinction in some cases, the same is happening with the artisans. The earth is flooded with cheap mass produced products causing almost extinction of crafts that’s been around for hundreds of year. But I am hoping they will never become extinct if we can at least save them one by one hand in hand with the rabbit and the starfish.

Day 102 `All right Dearie, just think that if it gives you comfort!’ and the Woods of Chocolate Buttons and the Pool of Liquorish Fish

The fact that all I want to do is to sleep is rather worrying. This got to the stage yesterday evening that I even thought: I simply won’t finish the thesis and the MA and just have long sleeps instead. How pathetic that is! I keep saying no to everything until the 7^th December including cooking a meal to someone who is ill and saying no to other person who needs a place to hang out for a few hours, because I am writing the thesis. I mean instead I fall asleep thinking I rather quit! I mean it is only 3 weeks now! Come on woman!!! Pull yourself together and drink more coffee!!! I didn’t even manage to write the blog last night, even though I try to make a conscious effort to get that done every day.

I got better with boundaries with people in the last couple of days, but I cannot do that with sleeping and it does worry me. I couldn’t move around the flat last night. The living room and the kitchen are taken for the weekend, which is actually quite refreshing and gives hope to hear people having a really good time. I can’t wait for the time when I can join in.

Going back to the uncontrollable falling asleep aspect of the evenings: all I can think of that more likely my laptop screen starts to tranquilize me with some peculiar silent lullabies whenever it gets bored of the thesis. And I can hear my fairy godmother voice saying: `All right Dearie, just think that if it gives you comfort!’ ‘All-right-Dearie’ fairy godmother voice has evolved somehow from the room share and normally followed by lots of giggles. My roommate did a night shift and much to my amusement as I was really unhappy having to share a room to start with I did miss having someone around making ‘search and catch’ hunting and fishing noises in the woods of chocolate buttons and the pool of liquorish fish.

Before I fall asleep, I did cut out and relocated pages and pages of research material in the thesis and was able to see straight away what was needed and what had just no place there at all. I think it was a great piece of advice I got to do it that way.

Day 101 From the Mormon Pants to The Cotton Project in Hungary during the USA Embargo on the Communist Countries in the 1950’s

Well, the cease fire of not pressuring me until I hand in the thesis didn’t last long with Mission Year. Within 2 days it was broken with yet another e-mail this morning demanding details of fundraising and fee payments. I really, really, really don’t need this kind of pressure. All this demand on time and money slowly but surely puts me off the ethos of Mission Year. I am crumbling under pressure and they send me detailed e-mails about how they think I should keep to my commitments. Situations in life change. I was supposed to finish the thesis by the time I started the program, but I couldn’t. My parents are not well, my finances are rocky, I am not even sure if I can manage to finish the thesis and I am given a lecture by a ‘supposingly supportive mentor’ who comes across more like a ‘holy-bully’ about the lack of my level of cooperation. I just so wanted to send a shockingly short e-mail with 2 little words in it and put an end to this whole pressure-plantation situation. Yesterday I got an e-mail asking to think about any of my friends who would like to join the program from January. To be honest I would only recommended it to people, who are not in debts and have savings. This kind of Mission program only works if you can afford it or if more than half of your team have well-paid city jobs, otherwise you are under constant pressure from the organisation to pay and go to their training evenings, regardless if you have no money at all for bus or buy food. People do not believe these things. Poverty starts when one has less coming in than the necessary going out and there is nothing left for bus fares and food. If I hadn’t got a food parcel last week I would have been really stuck in the past few days. We are told we should help each other out, but half of our team including myself are overdrawn and the rest is on the edge. I cannot wait for the first time I earn enough to be able to do a food shopping for mself.

Anyway, I better start writing my four 312words per subheadings that I promised myself to complete this evening. The time is 19:08. Let`s see when I finish with it.

19.23 pm

I just popped out with Diana to check out a Chester draw on the landing thrown away most likely by one of our neighbours and also spent other 10 minutes on filling out a questionnaire for a lovely friend of mine about hiring a wedding planner. For the question of ‘Are you married, or planning to get married in the next 5 years?’ I very ambitiously answered: ‘Yes, next year if I meet the man of my life.’

20.44pm

I just had the nicest sausages and mash with my flatmates and green apples with Hungarian acacia honey for dessert.

New strategy! I have 30 min for each section with a 15 min break in between, maybe this would work, because I haven’t written anything yet since 19.08 when I was supposed to start, but I had a great conservation during dinner and ended up coming upstairs with a cup of hot water with a random curiosity to look up Mormon pants on the net, as I have never heard that those things existed before and certainly haven’t seen any. As a true fashion/clothing industry graduate I straight away started to think about success rates and competitors of a business with such a specific target consumer in question. Internet is off again, I wait until I write 2 sections before I restart the laptop and look it up then.

23.18

One section out of the 4 is nearly finished, but I am going to finish it tomorrow morning. I have 7 and a bit for tomorrow to keep up with my schedule. Ouch!

From the thesis:

‘Local materials went through a considerable amount of change during the last century in Kevermes due to historical changes. The political scene brought more rigorous and sudden changes than climate change or environmental awareness.

Hemp:

After the World War I, when two third of Hungary was given to the surrounding countries including Transylvania to Romania, it brought a major change in local material growing and production. The nearest town to Kevermes was Arad, which became part of Romania after reducing Hungary’s territory during the Treaty of Trianon by 72% in 1920. Arad had and still has to this day a hemp processing factory where in the early 1910`s the writer’s great grand parents took their hemp to be processed. At that time every household used to grow Hemp in Hungary. (Kep kender toro) the long stamps were used to make ropes. (Appendix Kendert hehlo asszonyok).

Silk:

In the 1950’s the writer`s great grand parents have farmed silk worms. For that purpose trees were planted just outside of the village. The silk worms were kept in the ‘tiszta szoba’ a room kept tidy and clean without use to celebrate special occasions such as Christmas. The small paper boxes on wooden shelves were kept in the dark to be able to produce silk. (Domany to Fodor 2009). The mulberry woods have long been cut out and replaced by pine trees and the last traces of silk production stopped by the end of the 1950’s in Bekes county.

Cotton:

From the 1780’s onwards up to the mid 1950’s there were several strategies trying to produce cotton in Hungary. The country’s climate is not suitable for cotton production, but the. The plant needs 7-8 months warm weather, which in Hungary only lasts for 5 months. The most famously infamous cotton project of the 1950’s communist Hungary sprung from the embargo when the major exporter the USA stopped exporting cotton to the Sovjet Union and the Eastern Block.(LADÁNYI LÁSZLÓ: A magyar gyapot történetehttp://www.historia.hu/archivum/2004/0401ladanyi.htm).

Wool:

Wool production has been a significant part of Hungary’s economy since the Settlement of the Magyars of the Great Plain in 895… to be continued!

Day 100 Celebration time!

I can’t believe I made it to the 100^th blog, but I do believe that my passion for writing has been revived. Today I am just grateful for everything I have, every breath I take and every word I write.

The thesis has 48 headings if I counted them right which means if I write about 312 words for each headings, the whole thing doesn’t seem so bad any more.

I’ve been trying to work on the bibliography for a bit this evening. It can be so stressful to leave it to the last minute. Such a tedious job I keep falling asleep.

I found this in one of my research folders just a proof of my old diary writing habits:

Research dairy Saturday, 24/01/2009

‘Although I was really determined to write a research diary regularly, I mean every day during my 6 weeks study leave, I have to confess I haven’t done it yet. I was very proud of myself when I told one of my MA course mates that I make sure every evening I take time and write down, what I’ve done on that day.

Of course, I have not succeeded, as it seemed to me I have not done anything spectacular during the last two weeks, apart from being frustrated that every day, seems to disappear without leaving a trace behind, which makes me very disappointed. Disappointed, because I asked for and got and took 6 weeks unpaid study leave from work and it seems to me that I am wasting it and frustrated because I really wanted to do a lot of research, but I don’t seem to do as much as I wanted. After 1 week, I even gave up writing my research diary task sheet as well, because the tasks from the list seamed to drag on from one day to another, whiteout having to tick any of them and not feeling even tiny bit of satisfaction by looking it.

Almost every day, I felt I have wasted another day up until today, when as lighting from heaven on the way from the bus stop to my rented flat, I got the whole picture and suddenly understood the important meaning of the struggle of this past two weeks. I was so excited, I haven’t even took my coat off, juts set down to my desk and started to scribble down, the narrowed down focus of the research, which revealed the very important meaning of my struggles of the past two weeks and even more the complexity of the happenings since the course started.`

It so much fun to be so close to the finish!

Day 99 The Winter Coat that Looks Like a Dressing Gown and the Drama of the Day

8.45am

I am starting to work on the thesis and hoping to carry on until 12.30. If I can hit this target, am going to use my last free hot drink voucher at M&S before I go to work.

8.59am

Just after I wrote a really good paragraph turns out the spell check doesn’t work, because the document is too large. First obstacle of the day! No more please!!!!

9.51am

Breakfast eaten

11.28 am

Medical evidence from GP has been maintained for hand-in. I can’t believe she actually had a cancellation, which is very rare and within 20 min I was seen. She asked me what I do to look 10 years younger than my age. Well, I should really look 10 years older concerning that I lived my last 10 years sleep deprived, skipping meals and under utmost stress including a breakdown last year. She concluded it must be in my genes. I agree. No expensive facials, beautician once every couple of years and a cheap Avon moisturiser before I go to bed in the evenings all I do. But it does the job as I get almost daily approve.

12.33 pm

Another pressuring e-mail from Mission Year to go to the training evenings! I just can’t do it before I hand in the thesis. People can be just so inconsiderate. Yes, I understand I signed up for the year, but as it stands I haven’t managed to write the thesis while I was at home. I just want to, actually not just want to I did say, please don’t pressure me, it is not helping. All this pushing first with the money and now with the time, just really putting me off the whole thing. I just don’t want to listen to people lecturing me about what and how I should be doing, when they have no idea what a massive pressure their ignorance puts on me. I already have a massive resentment built up towards this let`s give up a lot of things and get pressured to give up more. There is a limit to when one feels comfortable to be squeezed not only by people and work, but by any organisation. After I finish the thesis, I am more than happy to take part in any activity they want me to, but at the moment these fortnightly meetings are simply not a priority.

13.03pm

Thank God it has been clarified; I won’t be encouraged to attend the meetings until the 7^th December, even though it is thought to be something useful to do in the midst of everything. It is unbelievable how our focus can be flicked by an e-mail and our mood sent on a roller coaster ride, whilst our precious time should be really focused on the matter in the protected area in question, in this case the thesis.

21.35pm

The funniest moment of the day was when a two and a half year old little boy told me my coat wasn’t a coat but a dressing gown. Kids’ logic is just amazing my coat does have a tie belt as most of the dressing gowns and made out of a quilted fabric, cut a bit like a dressing gown from H&M. His mum told him he should be careful what he tells women`s about their clothes! So funny I can’t stop smiling.

Ps I did have the hot chocolate, but after work.

Day 98 Patisserie Valerie in East London and the Dorchester afternoon tea

The first cold of the winter season officially hit me, but I am still in denial. I refuse to accept it and I simply don’t want to know about the fact that I couldn’t sleep last night and had shivers and headaches in the early afternoon. The whole Love Shack smells like a menthol overdosed sauna from the Vicks VapoRub inhalation water. We had great laughs about me trying to stay under the towel for 15 minutes in sunglasses to protect my closed eyes from the strength of the camphor. Intentionally I was supposed to write the thesis in the evening, but so many things happened I had to postpone it until tomorrow morning.

A friend of mine came over and we had a cup of tea and the wonderful Patisserie Valerie cakes she brought. The melting Mille-Feuille and the sumptuous Strawberry Gateau have overseen the past 5 years since we know each other in various Patisserie Valeries in London. We talked and talked and talked and I once again got invited to visit them. There is something really precious about keeping in touch with people even when we live countries apart. I remember years ago we went to a fish restaurant on the South Bank. It was a different world for me at that time, away from the long shifts in the store and the committed lectures. It was a little island of peace. We talked for hours about life and I was refreshed. I spent my whole week food allowance, but it was worth it. I felt like a human being, not like a robot. This time we were either supposed to meet at the Dorchester for afternoon tea or at mine. We chose mine and it was more precious than anything else. Nothing can beat a friend making the effort to come to your home, not even the Dorchester.

Day 97 Crunch Time is Coming

Today I hardly make any progression. I could not get myself to concentrate as I did yesterday. I started the writing at 2pm and until 4 I had 2 lunches 2 cups of teas, 1 coffee and nearly fall asleep. I had to move around in order to keep awake and proceeded to the living room where I made a little progress whilst watching David Attenborough`s BBC Wildlife series.

Crunch time is coming. I suppose because I can feel the tension of the deadline getting closer and closer I am already in that `tense-watch-out-deadline-is approaching-thesis-writing-mode’ and I function on a different wavelength. Everything is evolved around the thesis, my conversations, daily routines, eating, cooking and all sorts. Stephen keeps reassuring me it is going to feel as good as it sounds once I finish. I keep hanging on to this. I have been studying and working at the same time for 10 years. Briefs, deadlines, research, critiques, hand-in dates, tutorials and the whole package is part of my life. I am so tense now, as the adrenalin is rushing up and down in me, that I can`t even relax my muscles. My hands stay in typing mode even after I switch off the laptop. I really wanted to do a lot today, but I try a different approach tomorrow and proceed to a new section and hopefully will be able to produce a section that restores my targets and gives hope.

No wonder after the 12 hours copy and pasting yesterday my body and mind needed a less productive day.

Day 96 The Saturday Buzz of the Market versus 12 Hours Cutting and Pasting Shift on the Thesis

I am going to be very quick this time. I just finished a 12 hours straight structuring work on the thesis. I have copied and pasted all the research folders. I did take some super-mini breaks like popping my head out on the balcony to breathe some fresh air in and watch the Saturday lunchtime business of the market. Stephen had a friend around and cooked the most delicious Shepherd’s Pie. I am so grateful he has just finished his MA successfully and has great understanding of the whole process.
I volunteered to do the washing up , because I thought if I have to look at the laptop screen for another minute I was going to be sick. At this moment as I am writing these sentences I try not to look at the screen just the keyboard and save my eyes for the spell check. I cut and pasted together around 120.000 words on 520 pages which I have accumulated and wrote between September 2008 and march 2010. I typed into the laptop the leftover research over August and September this year while I was in Hungary.
Tomorrow I have to start the epic cutting away journey of finding between 15.000 – 18.000 good words amongst the 120.000 duplicated and triplicated case studies, interviews, conclusions and discussions.

Day 95 The Story of Hannah at the Bell Tower and the 7th Wonder of the World the Milk Chocolate Biscuit

I don’t know about you out there reading this blog, but every time I decide to have a lie-in I wake up ridiculously early and have this immense urge to get out of bed. Suddenly, even the most comfortable beds of all times begin to feel like a card box and all I can think of is all the activities I could do once I detach myself from the pillows and duvets. This morning was a bit less dramatic on the activities side, having a bit of a cold and cough I simply didn’t want to wake Izzy up with my sneezing and proceeded to the kitchen, where the nicest ever discovery was waiting for me. I got a wonderful food parcel yesterday from Mr and Mrs Landlord and as a direct result of that when I opened the cupboard this morning a whole pack of chocolate biscuit was whispering into my ears: ‘Eat me, please!’ How could I have said no to the melting crunchy 7^th wonders of the world! I had three of them keeping all of us involved in this greatly adventurous pirate operation happy! Pirate I say, because I wasn`t supposed to open them until I have Tamara and Shariq over for afternoon tea on Monday. But I haven’t had milk chocolate biscuits in that cupboard since I moved in and it is just wonderful to see the provision of God! I was thinking yesterday, I haven’t got biscuits to serve with the tea and by the evening I had a whole pack of them! Pure indulgence! God works in mysterious ways. I have been craving baked beans for about a week and for my biggest surprise there was the cutest can of baked beans in the food parcel I’ve ever seen. This is all so exciting!

I also have been craving chocolate and sweets for about two weeks now and last night on our monthly girls dinner at Buki`s there were the nicest chocolates and sweets I`ve ever eaten since I started Mission Year. Buki (http://www.bukiskitchen.co.uk/) made Tofu Stir Fry with Aromatic Thai Rice and it was just delicious. After plenty laughs and discussions we proceeded to the church`s bell tower for Benedictine prayer. As we meditated on our day the ticking of the clock above us watched over our thought. As time passed and we shared our struggles and pains, the longing for things we can’t even think sometimes we can have the clock as a reassuring hand of God beat our path through the rhythm of life towards eternity. If you want to quick and scream in your distress as much as you want to embrace the world in your happiness, do it He says. He knows our heart the desires, the hopes, the fears and sorrows. As we shared these desires, hopes, fears and sorrows we understood because of the brokenness of the world we will never experience life to the extent of perfection here on the earth. This can be heart breaking though to come to terms with, more so if you like myself were or still are a perfectionist. We read the story of Hannah, which helped us to put things into perspective.

1 Samuel 1 The Birth of Samuel from the Bible

1 There was a certain man from Ramathaim, a Zuphite[a] from the hill country of Ephraim, whose name was Elkanah son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. 2 He had two wives; one was called Hannah and the other Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had none. 3 Year after year this man went up from his town to worship and sacrifice to the LORD Almighty at Shiloh, where Hophni and Phinehas, the two sons of Eli, were priests of the LORD. 4 Whenever the day came for Elkanah to sacrifice, he would give portions of the meat to his wife Peninnah and to all her sons and daughters. 5 But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the LORD had closed her womb. 6 Because the LORD had closed Hannah’s womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. 7 This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the LORD, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. 8 Her husband Elkanah would say to her, “Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?” 9 Once when they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh, Hannah stood up. Now Eli the priest was sitting on his chair by the doorpost of the LORD’s house. 10 In her deep anguish Hannah prayed to the LORD, weeping bitterly. 11 And she made a vow, saying, “LORD Almighty, if you will only look on your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head.” 12 As she kept on praying to the LORD, Eli observed her mouth. 13 Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk 14 and said to her, “How long are you going to stay drunk? Put away your wine.” 15 “Not so, my lord,” Hannah replied, “I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the LORD. 16 Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.” 17 Eli answered, “Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him.” 18 She said, “May your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast. 19 Early the next morning they arose and worshiped before the LORD and then went back to their home at Ramah. Elkanah made love to his wife Hannah, and the LORD remembered her. 20 So in the course of time Hannah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel,[b] saying, “Because I asked the LORD for him.”

Hannah Dedicates Samuel

21 When her husband Elkanah went up with all his family to offer the annual sacrifice to the LORD and to fulfill his vow, 22 Hannah did not go. She said to her husband, “After the boy is weaned, I will take him and present him before the LORD, and he will live there always.”[c] 23 “Do what seems best to you,” her husband Elkanah told her. “Stay here until you have weaned him; only may the LORD make good his[d] word.” So the woman stayed at home and nursed her son until she had weaned him. 24 After he was weaned, she took the boy with her, young as he was, along with a three-year-old bull,[e] an ephah[f] of flour and a skin of wine, and brought him to the house of the LORD at Shiloh. 25 When the bull had been sacrificed, they brought the boy to Eli, 26 and she said to him, “Pardon me, my lord. As surely as you live, I am the woman who stood here beside you praying to the LORD. 27 I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. 28 So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD.” And he worshiped the LORD there. (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Samuel%201&version=NIV)

Day 94 Thesis Structure

Ok, I still need to refine this, but only really spent an hour with it in the morning and now it is time to go to bed. Goodnight thesis. See you tomorrow.

1 Introduction

1.1 Aims and Objectives

1.1.1 Aims

1.1.1.1 To investigate the reasons for the decline in numbers of skilled artisans in Hungary since the fall of communism

1.1.2 Objectives

1.1.2.1 To Compare the situation in Hungary with that of the UK and Italy

1.1.2.2 To consider the status of artisans from both that of the worker and consumer point of view

1.1.2.3 To investigate the role of policy making, both EU and Hungarian, in this decline

1.1.2.4 To survey the current economic climate in Hungary

1.2 Rational

1.2.1 Decreasing number of artisans in Hungary

1.2.2 To draw attention

1.2.3 To support local production/job creation

1.2.4 Hungary – home country. Change in attitudes since overthrow of communist regime Currently – more desirable to go on ‘welfare’ than work as artisan

1.3 Literature Review

1.3.1 Background reading

1.3.2 Major Debates

1.3.3 Theories

2 Methodology

2.1 Interviews

2.2 Case Studies

2.3 Soap making

2.4 Felt-making

2.5 Supplementary Reading

2.6 Business School

2.7 Innovation Management

3 Results

3.1 Findings from Interviews

3.2 Findings from Case Studies

4 Discussion

4.1 Looking into other reasons for the decrease in numbers

4.1.1 IT/Electronics Industry

4.1.2 Upskilling - money from the EU

4.1.3 Creating a ‘students’ only class

4.2 What have the effects on the population and the economy of these decrease in skills

4.2.1 Benefit Culture

4.2.2 Rise in demand for cheap clothes

4.2.3 Chinese phenomenon – mobility of labour – China is a growing economic power

4.3 Local materials, skills and markets

4.3.1 Materials

4.3.2 Skills

4.3.3 Felt Making

4.3.4 Spa industry – Specialist Industry

5 Conclusion

5.1 Database of local artisans

5.2 Tax/registration comparison

5.3 Lobbying of EU

5.4 Localism

5.5 Looking to long-term solutions

Day 93 Love Shack Dinner MY No. 1 and the Common Tale of Soaking Sponges

I couldn’t have asked for better flatmates, than the ones I got. We had our 1^st Love Shack Mission year dinner yesterday evening. I totally forgot about it and couldn`t wait to get home and go to bed, but the aromatic wonders coming alive in the kitchen and traveling up the stairs into my bedroom straight into my nostrils made me wide awake in a spilt of the second and from than on I was ready to dive into the dining room any minute the bell rang. Of course, the bell didn’t ring, instead Izzy`s sparkling blue eyes appeared on the top of the stairs saying whenever I was ready they were serving dinner. She made spinach tortellini with feta cheese on a bed of real spinach leaves and we had the most amazing dessert, white chocolate and raspberry Haagen Dazs ice cream (Limited Edition) and melted dark chocolate. It was just amazing! We had a great conversation about life and values after dinner and I felt in a very safe place. I confessed I wouldn’t necessary want to be anything else than self-employed in the future and would love to spend time with writing once the thesis is out of the way. Yes!

Today`s challenge with the thesis is to structure the headings and subheadings. Once I’ve done that I could start copy and paste everything in the right places what I`ve written already and hopefully edit it all during the last week of November. I would love to get it done by the end of the month ideally. All my flatmates are very encouraging about the thesis and generally we have a very good atmosphere in the house. I think it helped that we made a conscious effort telling each other what kind of little things make us cross. That was probably the best advice we got on the Mission year training day. I remember saying that I didn’t like the washing up sponge left soaking with water after use, because it got smelly. It still happens, but Diana got a holder for it and if people forget to squeeze it still dries. Also, because I aired that I don’t like it, it doesn’t bother me when it happens. I think far too often we let little things like that brew in us and at the end think to the extent that people do it in purpose just to stress us and we blow up out of the blue on a rainy day when nothing seems to go right by hearing the simple innocent question of the innocent person under siege who never new about our struggles with the wet sponge: Why didn’t you say something on the first place? And this simple apology soaked question leaves us somehow even more crossed and humiliated after all the arguments we had in our imagination with that ‘SpongeTraitor’ telling her/him/them off for leaving a box in the front room, where it shouldn’t be or `deliberately` making noise after we all went to bed and should be sleeping. And the worst thing is now we feel justice still hasn’t been done because the blame got back on us with that below the belt question: why we didn’t say anything on the first place! Really, why? Because, we didn’t want conflict on the first place! And now after such a long silent torturing suffering we are cooking in a massive pot of humiliation and anger, bruised in many places complaining on the phone to our best friend and family about that antisocial, simpleton next door.

Take a deep breath and start again with talking about those little things that bothers you, if I may humbly suggest.

Day 92 The Grace of Mourning the Lost Opportunities and the Beauty of the Last Resort

I tried to get up at 5am to carry on writing the Literature Review, but the pain in my chest and the well-known dizziness as I tried to open my eyes struck again just as they did during all those years when they were my closest companions. I just couldn't get out of bed. My body protested in every possible way it could and my mind brought back the memories of those over tired feelings, as my self-image dramatically started to grow smaller and smaller in front of my very own eyes by the demand of time and achievement on me through those soulless and ruthless ghosts of burden and strive. I almost disappeared from the face of the earth with a small desperate cry as many times before when I had a relapse of those moments of fear and despair. I only got up at 6am, started writing at 6.30 until I fall asleep again an hour later on the sofa.

10.50am

I am at uni at the moment. Stressed and wanting to quit. I resent the crumbling demand of performance on the life I could already have if I quit and it is called PEACE!

I just saw Yvonne at Study Support she asked me some focused questions about my research and suggested some points based on those which escaped my attention. It is 11.50am and I am still waiting for the confirmation where and when I am going to meet my tutor and my course leader.

I told Yvonne about me having had to take a year out because of the breakdown. She asked if I got help. I said I was told there was lot of help available at uni, but the truth is when you are in that situation, it is almost impossible to pick up the phone. I wish sometimes someone would have been there for me. I didn't say that, just thought. She said `You are not on your own, you must have gone through a lot last year. Do your tutors know about it?` she asked. `Yes` I answered, `but I don't think they actually know how to deal with a situation like this. They all seem to be so busy`. And also I think, thinking to myself because this is England, people are genetically inclined not to get involved with stuff that requires a bit more than Hi, How are you? and a cup of tea and a chat about the weather and holidays. At university with our tutors we are strictly keep to the projects we meant to talk about. I believe that is why Vivien made such an impression on me taking time to get to know all of us on her class when I studied Interior Design. And I believe that is why I made sure I took time out from the coaching sessions at work to get to know the person tucked into that black uniform from all over the world. Where he or she was coming from, what was their background, their aspirations to know how to approach them and build up a relationship and trust to be able to sound credible in what I was doing and saying.

1.20pm

I just had the tutorial I needed. After all I might take a Postgraduate Diploma Exit, but we will see first how the thesis goes. Susan asked if I wanted to ask for extenuating circumstances. I said no. I need to put an end to this MA and forget about the pressures of it. I was very honest how I felt about the whole thing and why I haven't read the brief for a long time. They were both great in listening and understanding. Amanda suggested I should personalise the brief on my laptop with colours and different fonts to make it mine instead of a black and white academic piece of paper. Great idea! We also came to an agreement about what I have to hand-in and I know now the word count needs to be between: 15.000-18.000. I also have to make sure I make my thesis visually engaging. I could use the felt I made as a cover with the bolts.

I am waiting for trying to get a slot with drop in Study Support to go through the structure of my thesis in details as Yvonne suggested during her session.

7pm

Two of Yvonne's students never arrived and I got their slots in the afternoon. That was just great! We went to Centre for Sustainable Fashion to look at some of the works from previous years that Susan and Amanda suggested. Yvonne put on a big smile and we had green lights for something you need to book an appointment in advance. As we talked I felt safe and rather encouraged. She told me she wanted me to meet someone.

And finally I had the meeting I should have had a year ago. We set in a small friendly office, where I learnt I should have been referred to the right people to help me through my illness by my course leader at that time, because there is support at university for situations like mine. It was a safe place to talk and I can't express how much I longed for a chat like this over the past year. It is only 3 weeks to go now and too late for most of the things, that should have been available to me all this time, but based on my doctors certificate I could hand my work in a couple of weeks later.

I am just spending a bit of time with mourning the opportunities I never had to talk through what and I how I felt and still feeling about this MA apart from the rest of the stuff that had been dealt with and the crises it partially caused in my life. And the causes of its cause. I need to decide in the next few days if I would want to take this last minute help from the university. I cannot become content yet with the fact that me going through this situation could help future cases to improve the communication about mental health support by bringing tutors attention to the importance of referring students in similar situations to the right people. I need some time to come to terms with being let down. This is the grace of mourning which is the last resort.

`People don't understand mental health` said the lady in the small friendly office.

`I know they see you as a high achiever with a massive drive and when your life falls apart they don't know how to deal with it`.

`They don't` she said.

Day 91 Prelude to That Dreaded Meeting with the Supervisors

8pm
I am really fed up now with this thesis. I have no interest in it at the moment, I don’t want to do it no more, I had enough and I am like a little schoolgirl, who just don’t want to do her homework. The strangest thing is that actually it is getting done. I am just constantly finding something a lot more important to do. I have consumed most of the sweets today I could find in the cupboard and some of Izzy`s as well. I want to finish it by 31st November! But today is a real struggle! I already had several cups of teas and popped my head through Diana`s door, just to inform her how fed up I was with thesis writing. I am officially constantly looking for excuses to have a break. I think I should really give a call to my mum, I haven’t called her today.
8:39pm
I talked to mum, made a cup of tea, watched a Youtube video and just about to have some chocolate trying to get myself into the mode of thesis writing. I even sprayed my room with some Marks and Spencer Lavender 3 in 1 room spray from The Floral Collection, but my spirit is still not on high for the 3rd point of the Literature Review: An analysis of necessity entrepreneurship in a local context versus taxes and bureaucracy burdens. Arghhhhh, I want to be a child and have a tantrum until someone picks me up and reassures me I don’t have to sit in the buggy if I don’t want to I can walk or run!!! I wish I could just pretend I have no responsibility with this MA. I am really struggling today. My eyes are aching and I am fed up.
I might be stressed because I am meeting my course leader and my mentor tomorrow to discuss what I have to hand in. And a half an hour session with study support, where the literature review is supposed to be read through. I might be just nervous. I need to distress. What is the best way to distress? Let`s try Chill Radio, go to bed and carry on with the writing tomorrow. I know what I am afraid of, what if they tell me I need to put more time and energy in it and I am going crash under the demand. I need to be realistic now, even if they do say that, it is not the end of the world. Come on, calm down!
I am going to have to rewrite and finish this tomorrow:
`Entrepreneurs are experts at spotting opportunities and organising resources to make new ventures happen. They have the vision and business skills to spot an innovative and marketable opportunity, together with the self-confidence to make the decision to set up the new venture and the courage to accept the associated risks. And, once the venture has started, they have the drive and leadership qualities to overcome any problems to make-it-happen.` (Burk, 2006).
The main questions of the idea, which the author tries to answer through this thesis has sprung from historical evidence of the decline of village tailoring by the effects of policy making in the author`s village tailor family, who is the third generation. This matter is further underpinned by her personal experience in investigating how to set up a creative business in her native Hungary in 2004 -2005 after spending 4 years in England and before starting university during a gap year. Because of the high entrepreneurial monthly taxes and the lengthy and complicated registration process the business wasn`t started until 2010 and in England where the online registration process of a sole-trader is no more than 15 minutes and the Secondary National Insurance Contribution is 20 times less than in Hungary. The made-to-measure generational family business was reborn under the name of Vondores mainly focusing on bridal and evening wear, stage and carnival costumes. Since then the differences between the English and Hungarian system for the self-employed sector and the countries different approach to entrepreneurship has a question of interest in the author`s life. This was the time when she first encountered the two different terms: necessity and opportunity entrepreneur. Necessity entrepreneurship is a direct result of transition economy, privatisation and high taxes, Reynolds et al. (2002, p.16) explicitly distinguish between “opportunity-based” and “necessity-based” entrepreneurship in their annual effort (Global Entrepreneurship Monitor) to measure the rate of entrepreneurial activity across countries. According to Reynolds et al. (2002), it is possible to label more than 97 percent of those who are entrepreneurially active as either opportunity or necessity entrepreneurs. Opportunity-based entrepreneurship involves those who choose to start their own business by taking advantage of an entrepreneurial opportunity. Necessity-based entrepreneurship involves people who start a business because other employment options are either absent or unsatisfactory. This paper also looks at the generational effects of self-employment within a family `There appears to be a positive relationship between self-employed parents and the probability of reaching a later stage in the entrepreneurial process, in particular for opportunity entrepreneurs.` Even though the generational self-employment is an internal factor within a family, many external factors are contributing towards the opportunity entrepreneurship, the same is true for necessity entrepreneurship: `For necessity entrepreneurs there is a negative effect of the perception of a lack of financial support on the probability of active involvement in the entrepreneurial process. ` Lack of government support from a policy perspective it is important to understand what drives and characterizes opportunity and necessity entrepreneurship. Do opportunity entrepreneurs indeed have a higher preference for entrepreneurship than necessity entrepreneurs (i.e., are they more motivated to become self-employed)? Reynolds et al. (2002) suggest that necessity entrepreneurs may not necessarily be affected by the same factors as opportunity entrepreneurs. This would imply that current programs designed to encourage entrepreneurship may be appropriate for opportunity motivated entrepreneurs, but not for necessity-motivated entrepreneurs. Opportunity and necessity entrepreneurship may also differ with respect to performance. It has been argued that opportunity entrepreneurship is more likely to have a higher contribution to the economy in terms of innovation and job creation (Reynolds et al., 2002). Hence, policy makers may need to develop different sets of policies to support opportunity and necessity entrepreneurship. The main goal of this study is to investigate whether opportunity and necessity entrepreneurs differ with respect to socio-demographic factors and attitudes towards entrepreneurial activity. Moreover, do opportunity entrepreneurs perceive and experience different obstacles to starting up and running a business than necessity entrepreneurs? Reynolds et al. (2002) finds that about 20 percent of the entrepreneurial activity that is reported, expect to provide no jobs, and about 53 percent of these individuals were necessity entrepreneurs. On the other hand, more than 25 percent of the entrepreneurially active adults expected to provide more than 20 jobs in five years, and about 70 percent of these persons were motivated by opportunity. Also, 9 percent of all opportunity entrepreneurs expect to create a new market, compared to 5 percent of necessity entrepreneurs. http://www.ondernemerschap.nl/pdf-ez/H200610.pdf